Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Run Away With Me

Attention fellow Angelenos! (no, I don't care for that term either)

And also attention to my friends out there in Brooklyn and whoever lives near Ohio State Univ.

The Nike Human Race 10k is happening again! This is a worldwide race where humans (that's you!) are encouraged to run 10k. Run alone, run with friends, and if you live in LA, NY, or OH, you can run with a whole big bunch of strangers.

I did this event last year and had a lot of fun.

So why don't you get off your butt and sign up? Oh wait, no don't actually get up because I need you to stay at your computer and go to this website. Or, get off your butt but don't actually leave the area. Maybe you could try standing at your desk, or holding your laptop.

Where was I?

Oh, right. Go to the website and sign up. I don't want to hear your excuses.

But I have never run in a race before...
Why not start now?!

But it says here the race starts at midnight. That's awfully late.

Okay, I admit this nearly stopped me, but then I thought of all of the other trouble I've been known to get myself into at that hour and running around through the streets seemed like a more intelligent choice.

But I don't eat right or exercise regularly and I'm completely out of shape.
Big effing deal. So is everyone else. I manage to work out MAYBE once a week, I never totally gave up smoking, and I just had a large Coffee Bean Mocha Ice Blended with whip cream for lunch.

Hmm. 10k. That seems really far. That's like 6 miles.
Actually it's 6.2. Which is really only like running for an hour. That doesn't make it sound much better. But if you start practicing now and run a few times a week, you'll be there in no time!

No. Really, I can't run that far.
Fine. Can you run 3 miles? Because you can sign up for the 5k too. That's much more manageable.

Alright. I'll run. But I'm not gonna like it.
Why do you always have to be like that? Is there no pleasing you?

I'm sorry. I'm just a little tired and cranky.

You know what will lift your spirits? Exercise!

I knew you were gonna say that.


kat said...

Well okay, I have come over here to "read" your post. (I actually read it already, but was scrupulously ignoring it, for reasons which I am about to make clear.) So here's the thing, Sucka: I do not run. Not for lack of trying -- I used to run, a lot-- but I never really liked it, and then one day I ran past a plate-glass window and I saw exactly what I look like when I run, and that was it. I adore your blog, but I run like a fat, ungainly rhino with a blimpy ass. So the answer is no. But I think it's lovely that YOU are doing it.

Anonymous said...

Oh DARN, I don't live in any of those areas! Poor me. I guess you will just have to go have all that FUN without me!

(I'm not actually that upset about this. That was sarcasm.)