Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Me Myself and I

Over the weekend, my dad called. He began our conversation with, "So bad fires out there in California again, huh?"

"Fires?" I asked, not really focused as I was driving to the nail salon and trying to make a u-turn at that very moment.

"Yeah. Forest fires."

"I hadn't heard," I laughed a little, "Guess I don't know what's going on."

"Oh well. Why should you if they're not affecting you? I guess," my dad responded. I think he was being sincere and trying to make me feel better. I hope he wasn't picking on me.

"So your mother talked to Sabrina the other day. You remember Sabrina, right? She was one of her old students?" Yes, I did remember her. Phew, I wasn't totally failing this conversation. "Well she's back in China now and apparently that earthquake hit her town really hard."

Earthquake...earthquake...what earthquake? Eh...

"Oh no," I responded. I may not have known what he was talking about, but this was still bad news.

I faked my way through the rest of the earthquake talk. I was glad to hear that Sabrina and her family were fine. But I was annoyed with myself for having no clue what was happening in the rest of the world.

Note to self: Google China earthquake

Or what was happening in my own city, for that matter.

Note to self: Google California wild fires.

Indeed, I would say that most of the time, if something doesn't include me, or immediately affect me, or isn't happening right in front of my face, I am completely oblivious to it.

And this is terrible. TERRIBLE!

This is no way to go through life. All caught up in my own ridiculous imagination and redundant affairs and pathetic complaints.

The week before Mothers Day, it took me til Thursday to actually go out and buy a card. Why did I wait until so late? No reason. I kept forgetting I had to go out and do it.

And then on Mothers Day, when I phoned my mom, she reminded me that it was also my late grandmother's birthday. Did I know that? No, of course not.

I'm pretty sure that Devin must love me for qualities other than my knowledge of world news (Cooking abilities? Eye candy? Split the rent with him?) because I can not hold a conversation about politics or the economy or the war.

Note to self: Google Carl Rove
Google Blackwater
Google "Difference between Senate and House of Representatives"

Every night I come home from work, see news footage of a candidate on a podium somewhere and ask Devin, "Is there another primary today?"
"Yes."
"Ugh, how many are there?!"
"Well, there's one for every state."
"Oh, right."

So I ask myself, when did I become so self-absorbed? And, more importantly, why did I become so self-absorbed when the life I lead is neither fascinating nor complicated? It's a happy life, but it's a dull one. I mean, Paul McCartney led a much more interesting life than I, but at least he knew what was going on in India, right?

It would probably be entertaining to know about something, anything else.

And yet it is so much easier to stay in my bubble. And not know what is happening in the world, or in my neighborhood, or in the minds of people I know and care about.

I'm such a winner. Am I the only person who feels stuck in my own head all the time?

15 comments:

not lisa said...

My parents scold me on a weekly basis for the very same thing: my lack of knowledge on current events, natural disasters, family birthdays, etc.

But then, my father also said these exact words last week: "The Hills? What are these hills that you and your mom keep making fun of? Are they on TV or something?"

Priorities, Dad. Priorities.

surviving myself said...

I'm the exact same way. It's easier this way.

P.S.
Please email me the difference between the senate and the house of reps.

thanks.

kelsi said...

oh, i do this all the time. i go through periods of being *completely* in my own boring head.
and then i realize that the only thing i can hold a conversation about is a t-shirt some guy was wearing on the train.
that's when it's time to pick up a newspaper again.
at least you're aware you're doing it...

Katelin said...

i used to be so out of the loop when i was in college. so now i check cnn every single day, i like to know a little bit of what's happening in the world, haha.

Tia said...

while i can sympathize with you about all the politics stuff, any natural disaster is immediately on my radar because i'm a crazy paranoid freak and i feel the need to be prepared for anything i cannot prevent.

i have no idea what a cacus is, or if that's even how you spell it, nor do i have any idea about the senate vs. house of reps, but i have a large supply of canned food and bottled water, should a crisis arise.

Just another silly girl said...

so I found out this year that a caucus is seriously a bunch of people standing in a room, and you go to a certain corner or area based on the candidate you like. And then the candidate with the most people in his or her corner wins. As though we are in 2nd grade and playing some ridonkulous game.

I had those conversations with my mom weekly in college. I didn't know political leaders, world events, etc. The current state of the country and upcoming election has gotten me a bit more interested, but it turns out when you decide to be interested in politics for the first time at the age of 28, you're missing some important groundwork, ie the senate/HOR thing. I just ask my husband and he tells me without making fun of me for being an idiot.

Either that or he's just making stuff up so that I look like more of a fool insisting to people that a caucus is like an elementary school game of 7-up, in which case I'm going to drop an elbow on him.

Anonymous said...

Every morning before work, I make coffee & breakfast, play with my cat, and watch Good Day LA. They cover both local and national news. Watch it if you haven't already. Not only do they give a concise newscast, but they're also VERY entertaining. Every day I watch them, I pretend I have fun dinner plans with them Friday night. Oh, and it's anonymous Kristen. Anyway, Good Day LA makes the news more interesting/fun.

Joy @ Big Time Fancy said...

Senate: Two senators per state.
House: Amount of reps determined by size of state's population.

Ta daaaaaa!

surviving myself said...

joy is smart.

Hollywood Sucker said...

not lisa- That's true. What I lack in knowledge of world affairs, I make up for in knowledge of exactly how many times Lauren Conrad wore that stupid side braid in the last episode.

surviving- I was going to look it up, but as you can see Ms. Smartypants Joy already answered that for us.

kelsi- What I'm wondering now is: Will I improve on my behavior?

katelin- But CNN's so booooring.

tia- Can I come live in your bomb shelter?

silly girl- Yeah whenever someone explains a caucus to me I think they are kidding. And then I resent them for making fun of me.

anonymous- Yes I used to watch that all the time when I lived in my studio apartment because, well the TV was right there in my one room. But now I never am in the living room in the morning and I can't imagine getting up earlier just to watch TV.

joy- Well, aren't we special.

mindy said...

So...I might be KIND OF the exact opposite. My own MOTHER actually called me a nerd not long ago. She wasn't even trying to be funny - she genuinely thinks my depth of knowledge about things like "the world" is really nerdy.

I don't know which of us is worse off...

Probably me since I spend a lot of time crying about the world's goings-on.

(Do I win the prize for Most Uplifting Comment Ever?)

raych said...

I get lost in world affairs, too...which is why I make myself get ready in the morning with the channel 7 news on...otherwise, I'd be clueless as all hell

Miriam said...

i've got fox news as my homepage- SIKE! jon makes news fun on the daily show. he often sparks my interest and then i'm inspired to dig a little bit deeper...

Peter said...

I stopped three times while reading this to try to decide if I have the proper amount of stubble for the day, or if I should shave.

So, I'm guessing you are fine.

devin said...

miriam tricked me into thinking i didn't like her there for a second.